VIENNA — Pastor Lynn Facemyer will open the doors of Vienna United Methodist Church on Dec. 21, the longest night of the year, to the community for a Longest Night service, a gathering created for those carrying grief through the holiday season.

The service begins at 5 p.m. at the Rader church (4 miles north of Vienna), a separate building from the VUMC, located at 34200 Hwy 63 N and is open to anyone in the community. Attendees can expect a mix of music, moments of reflection and symbolic acts such as candle lighting.

The service, held on the winter solstice, is specifically designed for anyone who is mourning the loss of a loved one or struggling through the holiday season which is often filled with expectation and joy.

For Facemyer, the purpose of this service goes back over 30 years, in fact, it was something she once needed for herself.

In 1994, Facemyer mourned the passing of her husband, Ray Christ, just days before Christmas. He was diagnosed with multiple brain tumors on Thanksgiving weekend and passed away 12 days later. Their two sons were only five and seven years old at the time. In the months after his death, she leaned heavily on her faith, attending daily Mass at the Newman Center in Columbia.

“I went to daily mass and just cried and cried, and nobody stopped me,” Facemyer said. “They just let me be and it was something I didn’t know I needed.”

The following year, 1995, she attended her first Longest Night service at First Baptist Church in Columbia. Facemyer went alone, unsure of what to expect.

“I didn’t know a soul. I didn’t know what to expect,” she said. “I was afraid of my grief, and I was afraid to name my grief.”

During the service, a candle was passed from person to person as each participant said the name of the person they had lost. When it was Facemyer’s turn, she spoke Ray’s name out loud for the first time in months.

“I realized I hadn’t heard his name out of anybody’s lips for months and months and months,” she said. “That, to me, was the most powerful thing… to hear his name once again.”

It’s safe to say that moment stayed with her and over time, she felt called into ministry and was ordained as a pastor in 2015. When she arrived at her first church after becoming a pastor, she asked if they had ever offered a Longest Night service. None had been done before, according to Facemyer.

“They told me, ‘we’ll give it a try’,” Facemyer  said. “And since then, I’ve done one every year.”

The service is traditionally held when the winter solstice occurs, as it is the night with the most darkness throughout the year.

“When it gets dark earlier, if you’re grieving, it’s harder,” Facemyer said. “It’s because you’re in the darkness more.”

Some people refer to similar gatherings as “Blue Christmas” services, but Facemyer prefers the name “Longest Night.”

“It fits,” she said.

Attendance varies from year to year. Some services draw large crowds. Others may only bring in a few people. But she said the size has never mattered.

“Sometimes it’s huge. Sometimes it’s four people. But no matter what, it’s powerful,” Facemyer said. “It’s always worth it.”

Facemyer is intentional about making the service open to everyone, regardless of faith background, or even if someone has no faith at all.

“The service is open to anyone in the community of all faiths or of none,” she said. “If you cry the entire service and don’t say a word, nobody will come and say, ‘Oh, it’s okay, honey.’ You’ll be allowed to be who you are.”

She said the goal is not conversion, but comfort.

“The Longest Night service is a place to come and be with others who feel as you do,” Facemyer said.

The service includes music, moments of quiet reflection and symbolic acts. In some years, participants wrote names on stones to take home. One ritual, however, never changes for Facemyer.

“I always light a candle for Ray,” she said. “That’s part of who I am.”

Facemyer remarried in 2006 to her husband, Richard Facemyer. Her sons, Matt and Zach, are now in their 30s.

Last year marked her first time hosting the service locally, with about 20 people in attendance.

“If one person comes away feeling a little less alone, it’s worth it,” she said.