I have been thinking a lot lately about fathers and how they affect the lives of their children, especially since Father’s Day will be observed on June 21st this year. My dad passed in 2003 at the age of 86. He was relatively healthy and active right until the end. The man not only left a positive impression on me, but also on his community.

Dad fought in the European theatre of WW2 and came home in 1945. He married Mom in 1946 and became a father for the first time in 1947. Father to 5 children, I was number 4 in birth order and “number two son.” Dad was firm but fair, stern yet kind and did a great job showing us how to become productive citizens and responsible adults. I was proud to be his son and loved him for all he did for all of us.

Married to Ruthann in 1977, I became a dad for the first time in 1979 and have been blessed with two sons. (Our daughter died one day after she was born and would have been 45 this year.) When the boys were born, I was so scared and at the same time felt an overwhelming love and responsibility for their livelihood. Their mother and I became a tag team and raised them to be successful human beings to the best of our ability.

I travel a lot in my work and tried to be there for the little things as well as the big things. I regret I was not always there for the everything in between. Their mother was, and always picked up the slack, covered my shortcomings, giving it her all 7 days a week 24 hours a day. The boys grew into fine young men. Justin is 6’-4” and Blake topped out at 6’-2” both college graduates and in professions they love.

My sons and I are mostly ordinary men, married to beautiful women above our pay grade, who turned us into folk heroes. One of my sons became an adventurer, another a singer and writer of songs, and me a storyteller. We treasure being dad’s and gladly share our wisdom, provide constant love to our families and occasionally tell dad jokes just to annoy everyone around us.  I always knew my boys would be good dads, but both have exceeded my expectations by being incredibly involved and loving dads. I am so very proud of the dads they have become.

I became a Papa in 2006 when my first of 4 grandchildren arrived. Gavin is now 20 and a junior at Texas A&M university, studying Industrial Engineering. He is doing incredibly well.

Like his dad, he had an incredible high school sports career and gave me a Papa moment several years ago that I will never forget.

He played 3 different sports as a freshman including baseball, my favorite. Blessed with the best Mark McGwire swing I have ever seen, Gavin could crush the baseball, consistently hitting homeruns for his team. Like any ball player, he went into a slump. Everyone was giving him the same advice, “you are pulling your head”, “keep your eye on the ball.”

His dad, Gavin and I all went to hitting practice, me just to watch. He did struggle.

Riding in the car on the way home, Gavin alone in the backseat, his dad was giving him a lot of unsolicited advice. Justin asked me to comment and critique. The back story is that I coached and played A LOT of baseball over the years, especially when the boys were young. Instead of correcting Gavin, I told him what I used to tell his dad when he had the same problem. “Practice by putting a baseball under your chin, this will force your eyes to look down, practice your swing. In a game, put your chin down toward your chest, pretend the ball is still there, keep your eyes down, don’t let that pretend ball under your chin drop! Watch the ball and swing.” From the back seat crickets, from the drives seat, the same.

The next game, Gavin was crushing it again. Justin asked: “What changed?” He replied: “Everyone was telling me what I was doing wrong, Papa showed me how to fix it.”  I was so proud of him and so happy he thought I helped. I still get emotional about it.

My other grandchildren are awesome too. Kayden 18, who by the way is my favorite (only) granddaughter, will play division 1 basketball after her senior HS season next year.

Declan, age 11 just made the 8th grade middle school football team as a 6th grader and his brother Lathan, age 8 is good at everything and just the happiest boy you have ever seen. All are great students and good kids, so proud of all of them.

Have you heard the song “Color Him Father “by the Winstons?  What a great song for all dads. One of the versus from the song is:

“There’s a man at my house he’s so big and strong.”

“He goes to work each day, stays all day long.”

“He comes home each night looking tired and beat,”

“He sits down at the dinner table and has a bite to eat.”

“Never a frown always a smile,”

“When he says to me how’s my child?”

“I’ve been studying hard all day in school,”

“Trying to understand the golden rule.

“Think I’ll color this man father.”

“I think I’ll color him love.”

All you fathers, grandfathers, dads and papas out there, enjoy June 21st. It is your day! Enjoy your family, we are so blessed to be loved. See you next month.